Basic Training Story #4357
As with any new experience with new people, it doesn’t take long to figure out the personalities and motivations of those around you. A few weeks into our cycle and I could tell pretty well who was dependable, who was a sh*tbag, who was entertaining and who was smart. Well, enter PVTs S and V.
Now both these young gents were funny bastards in their own rights but PVT S missed the 1st week due to some hay fever or allergy sh*t. So he never went through that initial anal reaming, discipline forging phase. PVT V grew up going to military-esque prep schools so he took none of it seriously because “he already went through this stuff.” So these 2 f*ckers hit the radar like Washout’s snot (Reference to the movie Hot Shots for those still sucking their thumbs).
A day never went by where 1 of them didn’t catch sh*t for doing/ saying something dumb. Well fast forward to the day we do the confidence course. As we gather around each event we get the safety briefs of your typical “Don’t be Stupid, don’t go too fast, if you fall I’ll laugh at you and when I’m done I’ll get a medic.” We get to the one where it’s all lines of rope in squares making a grid and we have to high knee over it.
After his brief DS S asks how many of us think PVT S will eat sh*t on the obstacle and half of us raised our hands chuckling. He then asks the same question about PVT V and again half of us raise our hands. A little later we go through the obstacles and PVT S is in front of me. We go through the high knees and PVT L who was half my size but built like a tank trips because the ropes are too high for him and to save his balance, mule kicks a foot to the rear blasting PVT S right in the sack.
I hear his soul escape his body as he goes down and I almost trip myself as I laugh. DS S, who was supervising, stood up in a flash and walked away laughing maniacally. Laughing to the point other DSs ran over only to laugh and make comments of betting on the right horse and making sure PVT L is always a doorman with a kick like that. We all laughed for about 10 min before we realized PVT S was still in the fetal position on the ropes.
He lived…jury’s still out on possible kids…and DS S never got a medic when he was done laughing.