F-16 Booty Call

It’s not every day that a full bird colonel takes his multimillion-dollar F-16 out for a booty call. And to tell the truth, I’m not even mad. That’s actually impressive. You think of baller ass players who roll up in a Lamborghini or Ferrari or even Koenigsegg, but this player is going to show up with a multi-million dollar air superiority fighter with missiles and bombs and shit. Doubtful that he actually had live munitions but for the sake of the hilarity we’re going to just assume that F-16’s go everywhere fully armed unless they are the Thunderbirds.

A Vermont Air National Guard Commander, allegedly, and it’s very important in the world of the Lance Criminal underground to continually use the word allegedly, used his F-16 to take a trip down to Washington D.C. to show his Army officer love interest that he really was the “Top Gun” in town. He was forced out of his job, which is sad. We’re quite proud of his ingenuity and ability to as we say in the lower enlisted world “Ball out”.

Several incidents of fighter pilots getting in trouble for…”harmless” fun have occurred in recent years with aircraft drawings in the sky. We were quite proud of those pilots at the time, and we won’t change our tone with this pilot.

As a grunt, I feel a certain connection to fighter pilots or attack helicopter pilots or basically anyone who shoots something with an aircraft because quite honestly, that’s super cool shit. When these aerial grunts decide to entertain us mere terrestrial grunts, they do so in wonderful beautiful fashion. They draw things and take their jets on excursions to see certain pretty women. In the name of all that is good and mildly degenerate, we request he be reinstated and for an investigation to be dropped.

I mean, after all, he was attending a conference for sky grunts in Washington D.C. as well. It’s not like he was taking it for a spin to the beach like it was National Lampoons F-16 Beach Vacation.

3+

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

2 thoughts on “F-16 Booty Call