BREAKING: Iran Shoots Down Drone

Categories: Military, News

Welp this was a super duper stupid move by Iran. It’s not a U.S. servicemember which was the line Mike Pompeo drew in the metaphorical sand, but it was an unarmed drone operating in international airspace. The U.S. Navy MQ-4C Triton that was shot down late Thursday night (local time) is an unarmed surveillance drone.

How f***ing dumb does Iran have to be? Literally. Everyone was assuming the tanker attacks were a set-up and a pretense for war. Even the non-tin foil hat wearing dudes were like “Yo, this is kind of sketchy, seems like WE really want a war.” Then Iran being just as smart as ever, decides “Hey, you know what will really calm the United States down? Shooting some of their shit.”

Yeah not likely. We’d moved troops in and we’d shown strength, but this…this is just a stupid move. If Iran wanted Washington to be cool, this like…the most unsuccessful way to make Washington be cool. We’re in a trade war and Iran thinks destroying our valuable shit is going to calm us down? Fat chance homies.

We wouldn’t be surprised if we break Iran into so many pieces Taylor Swift writes a new version of her song, except this time it’s called “You are never ever ever going to put your country back together.”

We got some big ol bombers, a carrier battle group plus whoever is still in Iraq and Afghanistan with all of our supplies and logistics. That’s just the shit we KNOW about. We’ll be very surprised if the response from the United States is not some sort of military strike that escalates this into full-blown war.

You can’t just go around launching SA-7 surface to air missiles at other peoples shit in international airspace. It’s not a solid look. It’s not a solid plan. That’s how you get a country to make a brash emotional reaction and say…

COWABUNGA IT IS MOTHAFUKA!

BTW Iran said it’s totes McGoats ready for war after shooting our shit down…so…fuk them dudes.

Know what we're sayin fam?

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