lasers

Boats and Lasers

It’s no secret that the Navy and US military has been experimenting with lasers for quite some time. With the threat of anti-ship ballistic missiles of the hypersonic sort or swarms of drones flying in, a laser seems to be a much more prudent defensive weapon than anything else we’ve had in our arsenal for quite some time. In fact, the laser could be game-changing, relegating anti-ship ballistic missiles and/or drones to the way of both the dinosaur and buffalo. That is…if it works the way we want it to.

Recently the Navy installed the new ODIN system onto an Arleigh Burke-class destroyer. ODIN stands for Optical Dazzling Interdictor, Navy. Between us gals though, we’re kinda disappointed because instead of being able to destroy a missile/drone mid-flight or bring an entire nation to its knees, the ODIN system merely jams/confuses the missiles/drones instead of really bringing the heat. We personally think you should save the ODIN moniker for something a bit more deadly, but nobody asks us about naming shit. In fact, we would have kept the “Navy” part off of the name, and just named it ODI, after the dog that annoys the everliving shit out of Garfield, that’d seem more appropriate.

Anyways, installing this nice piece of technology onto one of our destroyers signals to certain adversaries with a heavy reliance on anti-ship ballistic missiles or swarm tactics with drones *cough*China*cough* that they may have made a mistake in spending so much money on shit that’s going to be useless in a few years or fuck it, even now that we’ve got this optical dazzler…again with the names, why can’t we just call it the death ray or some shit? Throw some misinformation out there for our enemies to chew on.

Somewhere in “Diet Soviet Union”…

“Is it actually a death ray Ivan?”

“It’s hard to tell comrade general, we haven’t seen it in action.”

“Well do we know it isn’t a death ray?”

“No, no we don’t.”

One can hope, right? Either way, these lasers mark another step towards making all of our enemies shit obsolete and once again having unquestioned preeminence on the high seas…or so we hope.

Know what we're sayin fam?

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