Basic Training Story

When Getting Women Pregnant Goes Wrong

I was a Drill Sergeant at Ft L.Wood in 1980 – 1981. It was about 6 weeks into Combat Engr OSUT I was on staff duty on a Sunday. Training schedule had the trainees with a 1/2 day off. It was late afternoon, most of the trainees were out of the barracks and it was sort of quiet.

PVT W came to the office with a worried look on his face. Sensing something was amiss, I asked him to sit and talk. He told me that he just got off the phone with his girlfriend and that she was pregnant.

I gave him the usual DS pep talk. “You stupid idiot, Don’t be silly wrap your willy.” Etc. He took it in stride and seemed to have more to say. I said “What, is there anything else?”

“Yes Drill Sergeant, I seem to have gotten her mother pregnant as well.”

I started laughing, about that time my relief came in. I made him tell him the same story. We had a good laugh.

Then I called the Chaplain and sent PVT W on his way. I let the professionals handle this one.

He finished OSUT and I never heard about him again. It’s around this time of year (Thanksgiving) when I think about him and his “family” and I just laugh.


Know what we're sayin fam?

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4 thoughts on “When Getting Women Pregnant Goes Wrong”

  1. A long time ago in a galaxy far far away. I was a Drill SGT at Ft McClellan. One night I was the staff duty Drill. As I was about to lay down I heard the phone ring. PVT Johnson answers. “Yo wus up?” I then hear Drill Sgt it’s the CSM.

    After answering a few questions about sick call numbers, The CSM says by the way. Before he could finish the sentence I interrupted and told him PVT Johnson would be retrained on how to answer the phone.

    I wanted to make a point. The cycle was at the end of their second week. They needed an attitude adjustment. So after a poor nights sleep I had it.

    I set up the traffic control box outside of the chow hall. PVT Johnson was posted on the box. I instructed to answer his imaginary phone as each person entered. It was a Sunday so he was posted for the entire training brigade.

    At first he started out PVT Johnson Charlie 795, how may help you sir or mam? I stopped him. PVT you forgot to ring your phone. You know ring ring! So he got to ring ring a couple thousand times for breakfast lunch and dinner that day.

    A few years ago while working in my civilian job. I hear Drill Sgt! Drill Sgt!!!! This is not something I had been called in almost two decades. I look up. It’s CSM Johnson.

    We started talking and he invited me out to lunch. When we got to his office I got the biggest laugh. His name plate said CSM Ring Ring Johnson. He looked at me and said he could never shake it. Everywhere he ever went in the Army world someone knew about his imaginary phone.


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