Happy Dead Stalin Day

Categories: Events, News

Some would say…it’s not nice to celebrate the death of someone. They say that…in that person’s own way, they were just doing the best they could to get through the shit-show that is adulthood and life. Those people who’d say that…when speaking of Joseph Stalin, can go f*** themselves with a chainsaw. Joseph Stalin will always be remembered, at least by people that read books and shit, as one of the worst people to ever live and one of the most murderous pieces of shit in the 21st century. Mao beat him out. It’s like the worst people always seem to flock to Communism…hmm what a trend.

On this day in 1953, that mustachioed tyrant died. And we’re going to celebrate. As should you. Because f*** Stalin and f*** Communism. If you’re curious as to why we’re so happy about this day, it’s because that walking, talking shithead killed anywhere between ten and twenty million of his own people…because you know Communism is totes for the people. What a f***in’ Utopia!

In the mid-1940s when Stalin was at the “height” of his power, the Soviet Union had a population of 170.6 million people. Let’s do the math right quick. We’re going to use the 170 million as the population from 1945 and the estimated twenty million killed. Rounding the numbers up just to be on the safe side…you had a 1 in 11 chance of being killed in Stalin’s glorious Soviet utopia. Think of ten other dudes or dudettes, add yourself in, one of you gets dead for being a “political dissident”. Nice right?

Let us also not forget that until Hitler double-crossed him, Stalin was totes cool with the Nazi’s f***ing up the rest of Europe. It’s only when Hitler’s ambitions led him to strike at his one-time ally that Stalin decided Nazi Germany was totally not cool. They weren’t in love, but tyrants of a feather always commit mass murder.

So remember kids. Commies suck ass and are usually friendly with other murderous totalitarian regimes. Despite whatever utopia they promise you, you’re more than likely going to get the utopia of a gulag and hard labor for the rest of your days.

#HDSD (Happy Dead Stalin Day)





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12 thoughts on “Happy Dead Stalin Day

  1. As ‘Moms’ Mabley use to say:

    “You should always say something good about the dead.

    “He’s dead.


  2. An estimated 100 million people have been murdered by communists**. Their regimes made slave labor out of many 10s of millions more. Their destruction and censorship of non communist literature and art vastly exceeded what the Nazi’s did. Stalin signed a treaty with Hitler which made the Polish invasion (from both the Nazi and Communist armies) possible, thereby beginning WW2. Stalin allowed the early Nazis to test out their weapons -which were banned by the WW1 peace treaty – on Soviet soil and gave them raw materials for weapons production.

    How many modern movies or TV shows have Communists as opposed to Nazis as the villains?

    ** https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Black_Book_of_Communism

  3. From the time I was 19 until I was 31, I served in one of the strategic arms that was in a cold war with Stalin’s successors. Brezhnev, Andropov, both begat by Khrushchev, who was the last man standing when Stalin died.
    The only surviving remnant of that regime apparat is ex-KGB agent Vladimir Putin.
    These murderous psychopaths had a dedicated and vocal following in the US when they were alive and in power. They still are venerated by the useful tools and fellow travelers, some of whom now sit in Congress.

  4. My in-laws both lived through the worst of the Stalin years in rural Ukraine. According to them, when the news arrived that Stalin was dead, the first reaction wasn’t immediately joy but immense relief–as if you’ve been told your death sentence has been commuted and a thousand pounds were lifted off your shoulders. The joy came more gradually as the reality sank in. There was still fear about who the next tyrant would be, but having the worst bad guy dead allowed for slivers of hope.

  5. For a bone chilling look into this cocksucker’s paradise, read the recently released “Kolyma Stories” by Varlam Shamalov. First English translation of his tales from his 17 years in the camps. Like the majority of the prisoners, he was “political”. You know: He was there for thinking bad thoughts.
    Sound familiar?